heorte: (Default)
ellis ginsberg. ([personal profile] heorte) wrote2021-03-06 07:30 pm

when i go towards you it is with my whole life.







You came to the side of the bed
and sat staring at me.
Then you kissed me—I felt
hot wax on my forehead.
I wanted it to leave a mark:
that’s how I knew I loved you.
Because I wanted to be burned, stamped,
to have something in the end—
I drew the gown over my head;
a red flush covered my face and shoulders.
It will run its course, the course of fire,
setting a cold coin on the forehead, between the eyes.
You lay beside me; your hand moved over my face
as though you had felt it also-
you must have known, then, how I wanted you.
We will always know that, you and I.
The proof will be my body.
— louise glück
heirring: ([033])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-13 04:25 am (UTC)(link)
"Oh, no. I'm not a very accomplished storyteller, Ellis. I always turn the order of introducing points around, and find myself at the end of the thing having forgotten entirely about some detail I should have introduced earlier. I know a fair few, but guarantee that I would butcher them were I to try to recite them. But if you like, I might try to write one or two down. I might have a better time of it if it were put on paper. One can always revise that sort of thing, whereas I have learned it's very difficult to just take back words."

Somewhere in this long recitation, she has returned her hands to him in accordance with the invitation made by his own. Standing there in her long sleeved chemise and short stays, flat footed in her wooly stockings, she is extraordinarily unembarrassed—rosy cheeked and in broadly high spirits, the tempo of her conversation galloping gaily along to the crack-pop of the fire in the hearth. One of her hands turns; she pinches Ellis gently on the skin stretched between thumb and forefinger.

"Besides, I have heard that we have quite the early morning ahead of us."
heirring: ([030])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-13 07:58 pm (UTC)(link)
Wysteria, despite her reputation (unfounded, surely) of having a great capacity for obstinacy, can in fact occasionally be swayed from her target. It ordinarily requires certain prerequisites: uncertainty in her goal, maybe, or spirits high enough to survive some denting, or a great deal of flattery. It helps, of course, when this latter one comes from someone she should like to praise her.

Ellis rarely allows her the pleasure of squabbling so she can be correct, but sometimes this is a little like that—a cheery cycle of protesting some point or another, then folding with much false put upon exasperation usually only after he's relented a little to begin with. Here, the familiar game plays out with a dramatic tsk from Wysteria, and a lively slapping away of Ellis's hands as if to say, Oh, very well you. But only because you've asked so nicely—

She can do two things at once.

"Once a long time ago there were three siblings," she says, primly reaching once more for the lacings of Ellis's tunic. She is very delicate with undoing the cording, fussing with the tie. "Barclay, who was strong and handsome and loved his father, and Irmine who was clever and graceful and loved books, and Adda who was sly and knew all there was to of the land where they all were born.

"—They are all, naturally, representative of various bits of Kalvadan history," she adds. "This particular story is all meant to be about how the original throne was split."
heirring: (rumpled and still superior)

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-14 05:44 am (UTC)(link)
No, she has never undressed him save for that one dreadful night spent hunkered in that spare outbuilding, stripping him free of his battered armor with the intent to see to his abused body excavated out from under dented plate. But in this little room with the crackling fire and the piled furs, it isn't difficult to undo the lacing of his heavy wool tunic. Indeed it seems quite natural to pluck free the cording, and to move her hands to the collar of his undone gambeson so she might encourage it from his shoulders.

"Oh no, not at all. Or rather, I suppose it was some combination of the two, as over the course of the nights each sibling was visited by a prophetic dream of sorts. Adda had a vision of a great region being divided, and Irmine the tongues of many people being distilled to into one shape, and Barclay had the most terrible vision of all which was his father's body being divided to nourish a dozen hungry mouths. And so and so forth—all highly metaphorical imaginings, I assure you."
heirring: ([029])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-14 06:21 am (UTC)(link)
The gambeson is shed. He moves to address his braces. Wysteria, meanwhile, gamely makes to pluck the hem of his woolen tunic free.

"Each siblings took counsel in their own fashion, of course. Barclay consulted the oracles, and Irmine the old texts, and Adda refered herself to the voices which spake from the wood, until at last all three siblings were resolved on what must be done. And so in the pitch darkness of night, they took to their father's room. There, Irmine distracted him with stories, and handsome and strong Barclay restrained him, and Adda carved him up in accordance to the drawing of borders on her free land, and so on and so forth. And then, I think, in the original there is a bit about the taste of the old king's flesh. I liked it when I was a girl as I was very morbidly minded, you understand. But the general idea of the thing is that all three siblings see the future, and know they must sacrifice their father to achieve it, and his body empowers them to achieve their visions. And that is more or less how the three crowns of Kalvad were formed. Take this off, would you?"

She has raised that wooly hem considerably.
heirring: ([036])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-14 11:35 am (UTC)(link)
"Just so," she confirms. No, it isn't particularly well told. She has rushed past all the best parts. But if he thinks so, then who is she to argue the point? Let him believe she is some expert storyteller, she thinks, her fingers itching after this lighter, more perfunctory (in the moment) layer he has on.

"You will be pleased to know that the actual history doesn't involve cannibalism. Uhtric one crowned was the last single monarch of the empire and was unseated in the normal fashion of being allowed against and there being a war. Barclay is meant to be a representative of Uhtric's own people, and Irmine the Kalds which were a sort of northern folk, and Adda the martyrs who were more or less the first magicians. —Mages, rather."

Under this guise of cheerfully prattling on, Wysteria has found her way to this last bit of lacing and picked it open. Now, her hands shift to take the thin tunic by its collar and the lines of her forearms brush and then settle against the plane of his chest.

"It's one of the more direct stories concerning the whole matter. There is also one from the point of view of a fox outwitting various traps, for example. And Adda is one of those common figures of folklore who is in all sorts of stories and tends to be whatever is required of her. Including sometimes being a him instead of a her, although I've personally never cared much for those. May I take this one off myself?"

Standing there before him with her face turned slightly up to account for the difference in their height, it's a very eager sort of question. Quite plain. He keeps taking this part from her, and she wants—

Well. To take his tunic off of him, at least.
heirring: ([037])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-15 01:11 am (UTC)(link)
Had she expected him to refuse her? No, surely not. After all, he so rarely does. Yet having her request so promptly granted sparks something bright in her. She nearly laughs over it as he makes to sit and draws her there after him.

Indeed this posting serves her perfectly well, and she takes to it promptly enough—so pleased to be indulged that she hardly shies over the task of chasing after his tunic's hem.

"Remind me, and tomorrow I'll see if I can recall any of the Brave Ivanhoe adventures. I think you would like those better than any of the founding sagas. They have slightly less obtuse reasonings behind them, I suppose. —Oh," she says. She has drawn his tunic halfway off over his head though pauses suddenly.

"But will you be cold if you're stripped down?" And then, in a rapid and only slightly blistering reversal of this reconsideration— "Well, no. I suppose you can put it back on after if you decide you've a chill."

Hence, she hurriedly peels the light rumpled tunic the rest of the way free of him.
heirring: ([029])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-15 01:11 pm (UTC)(link)
In truth, that pause had been just that—a silly, twittering sort of hesitation disguised even to herself. But as he stands again, she recognizes it. Or, at the very least, she becomes very aware of the result of all this effort. He is so very broad and the bursting dark shape of that tattoo lodged at the center of his chest is so very immediate.

She is still holding his tunic. So Wysteria abruptly folds it in half, steps slightly sideways and thrusts it unceremoniously over the chair arm while saying, "I am positive Serah Tomar would prefer not to be regaled by myself, so I think I will save it for later. Besides, it will be good for me to try my hand at talking and skating at the same time."

(Implies she hadn't chattered along the whole way down the river, which is fundamentally untrue.)

He still is very broad and his tattoo very dark when she has finished dealing with the tunic. Her hands though, which have been more or less occupied since they came to the room, are abruptly without employment, and for a moment they hover unconsciously in clear indecision. Then she catches him by both wrists and authoritatively places his hands back at her waist.

"We should decide now if I am seducing you or not tonight."
heirring: ([018])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-15 10:47 pm (UTC)(link)
"Oh," is half fluster and half objection, though her hands both stay put at his wrists, firmly anchored. "Well if you would prefer to be surprised, I can make those arrangements. I only supposed you might have an opinion on the matter."

Stop there, says good sense, yet she continues to qualify: "I realize, Ellis, that you have a habit of being entirely accommodating. But as has been previously noted, we've something of an early morning and all manner of danger and adventure to account for, and that seems to be to require some measure of deliberation."

She is merely being sensible and considerate.

"So say the word and we will go to bed. To sleep, I mean."
heirring: ([033])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-16 04:57 am (UTC)(link)
Tomorrow evening they are meant to go scuffing back upriver to the lodge, which she would not describe precisely as gloomy—(and truly what does she care about that? The Gallows is gloomy. The house in Hightown is certainly grim)—, but somehow feels like oddly close quarters despite being considerably larger than this little room or even this little public house. Even so—

Well it is all at once something like a relief. Not to avoid the thing this evening, but to have it marked and placed on a metaphorical calendar. Yes, suits her perfectly well. Look at all these hours she has to organize her thoughts on the matter. A deadline, or a fixed point in time, can be a very fine thing.

"Tomorrow," is prim affirmation and threat both. This is a plan and she clearly means to keep his feet to the fire over it. "If you arrange to be mauled by a wolf, I will be very cross with you."

She squeezes his wrists and squints at him for emphasis. It's only after this warning has been given a moment or two to marinate that she unravels her hands from him, saying, "And Brave Ivanhoe will have to wait of course," as she steps back and moves to see to her stays.
heirring: ([089])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-19 01:29 am (UTC)(link)
"No, not at all. There is a great assortment of them. He is rather like—well, I can only think of Monsieur Royan's Black Fox at the moment, although Brave Ivanhoe isn't really much like him at all save for the fact that there are lots of different stories about him and they can all be taken together or apart, and I imagine someone has translated most of the Black Fox's adventures in all sorts of languages. He is one of those repeating characters in folklore for which there is a story you may use for nearly every occasion."

This she chatters out in not quite raid succession, pattering along at a clip one might consider perfectly respectful were it not slowed by her attention wandering after Ellis as he crosses to see to the fire and brazier; she's never seen him in his drawers in anything like real light. To say nothing of the fact that, before he turns the coals over, she can clearly see the scars left behind on his back by that dreadful crush of armor; and the marks of other old hurts with them, a great array of markings like points on a map.

But lest she be caught examining anything above Ellis' waist or below it, she has turned away by the time he's finished with the fire.

"We had a book in the house which collected a great deal of his adventures and was prettily illustrated. They're usually in verse, of course," she says, folding her stays once over and then laying them with the rest of her things. "Which I won't be able to reproduce. I've no head for reciting poetry, as well you know. But I think I remember the general sense of a few of the stories enough to pass them broadly along."

From her satchel, Wysteria wrestles free a length of bright blue calico. She is already moving to the bed as she makes to wrap the cloth about her hair. If her hair isn't coming down, there is no reason not to see its shape more or less preserved for the morning.
heirring: ([044])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-19 04:50 am (UTC)(link)
In that coppery dark, the naked glow of her anchor shard washes the air about it a cool and sickly green. She hardly notices it as she secures the calico and tucks its ends in under the edge. The whole effect is absurdly domestic—more unvarnished and straight forward than even the brisk no-nonsense way she'd asked whether he cared to obligated to submit to her wiles.

"Well," she says. His hand on her knee is warm through the fabric of her chemise, and the piled furs are both prickling and soft. It's an acceptable state of affairs for the evening. Yes, it's true. They do have time.

"I'll see if I can remember one or two or the best ones to start with then and see where the rest fall in to place after."
heirring: ([127])

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-19 05:53 am (UTC)(link)
She is shifting to make room for him there among the blankets and furs, beginning to unfold her legs so she might stretch them out, but this question draws her briefly short. Would she like that? To come back here to this little room over the relatively quiet public house main room, with rooms to either side of this one and a inoffensively bedraggled landlady overseeing the whole of the property? Certainly the room is far smaller than the one they've been permitted at the lodge. With the fire lit and the brazier uncovered, she had been able to see him in so much detail.

(For an instant, she misses that tiny closet of a room in the Markham collegiate dormitories.)

With a sniff, Wysteria kicks her feet in under the blankets and pats the space beside her in an effort to urge him to hurry into bed. She is pulling these covers up shortly, Ellis. Best to see yourself under them immediately lest you be left outside of them— and so on and so forth.

"Let's see how late the hour is after we've finished our work. It's possible we will have no choice at all in the matter and be forced to stay or attempt to skate back upriver in the dark."

Yes, she thinks. She would to come back here.
heirring: ([139])

acceptable

[personal profile] heirring 2022-09-20 06:05 pm (UTC)(link)
A scrape is indeed what they find themselves in the following afternoon after a long morning of traipsing into the mountains led by Serah Tomar. Happily for the poor man in question—who is not unkind, merely that gruff sort of backwoodsman who finds being drawn into relentless conversation by young women baffling—, the exertion of snowshoeing puts something of a dampener on the clip of Wysteria's narration. It is one of those activities which loses its whimsy relatively quickly for the unpracticed, particularly when one is obligated to practice it rather than simply indulging in a bit of fun.

What awaits them at the end of this long hike is more or less as expected; a pack of slavering, overlarge fade touched wolves driven near rabid by the touch of the thinning Veil, and a rift punched into the winter thin atmosphere. Tomar judiciously doesn't accompany them that far, but rather sets up on a ridge where he will be untroubled by either wolf or demon. Were he slightly less aged, Wysteria might elect to be put out by the man's good sense of self preservation. Regardless, she leverages this fact and Tomar's lack of conversational defense as ammunition later when they are loading the corpse of a large dead wolf onto a litter of freshly hacked pine branches.

('Serah, I beg you not question Warden Ellis and I's expertise in this matter, given all that we've accomplished this afternoon,' and so on and so forth.)

The sum of these things is trudging back down into the village as the sun sets, sweating despite the cold and stinking of viscera and exertion both.

And how tremendous a success! They will have to borrow a sledge and take an intrepid team of goats back to the lodge come morning in order to see the corpse transplanted back with them, and Wysteria spends a jubilant half hour arguing with a local in order to secure just that. To say nothing of the further hour she spends in the company of the dead creature in the bitter cold of the public house's wood shed, taking extensive notes for the benefit of Mister Dickerson whenever they should eventually make their return to the Gallows.

It's only after darkness has fallen in around the woodshed that she suddenly looks up and pauses writing in her little field book.

And then all at once, Wysteria is on her feet with a cry of "Oh!" And then, more mortified still: "Oh no."

When she bursts into the public house's back room where, in exchange for the use of the shed for storing cursed animal bodies, Ellis has been put to work helping the landlady with the repair of the store room's shelving, there is a distinct air of something like desperation and horror about her person. She is still in her traveling clothes, mud and demon-sludge black at the hem, and is pale under the winter blown pinch of color at her cheeks and nose. Maybe she has found out something dreadful from the wolf's corpse. Maybe it hadn't been Fade touched at all, merely possessed, and now is a corpse prowling the village hungering for the bones and flesh of something more human.

"Have you seen the landlady?"

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